I have a confession to make. It's something of which I'm not proud. Most of the time I am a loving person, respectful of the fact that all of God's creatures deserve a place in this world.

Unless you are a cat.

Maybe my hatred stems from the evil Siamese cats in "Lady and the Tramp." More than any other villain in a movie, I wanted to hurt them. I would envision them being catapulted into a wall. Really hard.

One of my main issues with cats is that they are sneaky. They lurk around and stare at you like THEY own YOU instead of the other way around.

I try to be nice to the nasty little furballs. I don't pull their tails or "inadvertantly" step on them. Hell, I even used to enjoy feeding my aunt and uncle's cats when I was younger. What did I get in exchange? Nothing! Not a cuddle or a meow or even a little brush against my leg. Ungrateful bastards!

Some people would call this "independence." They are wrong! If I take care of an animal I want some affection in return, not their backsides as they walk away. Cats are haughty animals. I don't associate with snobbish people. I certainly won't tolerate snobbery in my pets.

If you're in the market for a pet, my advice is get a dog, unless you're a snob. I assure you that the two of you will make good companions.

Love,
Supersteph